In a way, I’ve gone rogue. In another, I’ve come home to myself.
 

 

Obligation, playing by the rules, doing what’s expected, following the normal timeline. In the deepest part of me I have never felt fully aligned to any of these bullshit concepts. If I had a nickel for every time I’ve been told I have a “problem” with authority, I wouldn’t need a day job.

Even though never fully aligned, I tried so damn hard to make those four concepts a part of my story and my life, weaving them in and out seamlessly like the good human I was supposed to be. I made the good grades, never snuck out, rarely partied, went to college, followed that with graduate school, made it out with honors and a degree I thought would keep me employed and comfortable, bought a house, adopted dogs, and married my high school sweetheart. On the surface, I had achieved the All American Dream.

But it wasn’t right. It wasn’t for me. None of that timeline shit. None of that obligation. None of the following following the rules. None of the doing what’s expected. None of the “shoulds”. None of it, with the exception of adopting my dogs, brought me that feeling of relentless satisfaction.

So one by one, I blew it a up and walked away. And I am still walking away. Walking away from those things that don’t suit me. Walking away from those things that don’t serve me or support me on my path towards unapologetic happiness. Some may see it as selfish, but I see it as the purest form of self love.

I refuse to follow rules. I refuse to conform. I refuse to follow societies timeline of what you should do when, who you should be with and why, what job you should have because you got a degree in it or what sacrifices you should make because you feel obligated. I am on a journey of pure motherf*cking awakening. An awakening of my own true soul, my own true essence, my own true self. In a way, Ive gone rogue. In another, I’ve simply come home to myself.

And so to honor this homecoming, I am pursuing new creative dreams and passing along the moments, the stories, the insights, and the failures that led me here. From the highs of falling in love to the lows of losing those I love, and all the madness in between. It is my hope that this community inspires you to honor your roots, your story, your dreams, and your very own rogue wanderings, because sometimes going rogue simply means we’ve finally decided to come home.

- Courtney